I think a Tranquilizer is in order

(“I think a Tranquilizer is in order.” – Grams, about an hour ago.)

Helllllloooooo People!

I am not dead! Here I am! ( I think?)

Thank you to those who have checked up on me! I am alright. There’s been a whole  hell of a lot going on….


Quick recap, shall we?

  • I’ve moved out, and am all moved into the town house.
  • Ex was partying, frequenting online dating sites, and ignoring my son..but trying to “Date me”.

holly 2

  • I squashed that, and put my foot down about my son. Ex was told there would be no coming and going. My son is not something that can be picked up, and put down whenever convenient. Ex then declared more effort would be made (that was in November). Ex and I made a plan on visitation and how to best support my son through all of this.
  • Ex has disregarded the plan and has ACTUALLY said the words “I am choosing me, I am choosing to be selfish.”
  • On more than one occasion the Ex has chosen to drink over spending PLANNED time with my son.


  • I Officially filed for Divorce, I will be done with that in a few months.
  • Ex is still partying, and has time for friends but not my son, and has not initiated contact in over a month, and prior to that it was only made if I initiated it.
  • My son has been good in school EVERY DAY for 3 weeks IN A ROW. IN.A.ROW. That is unheard of. So proud of that kid. He’s come so far, and is trying so hard <3


  • My beloved laptop died. I just got him back. Yes, HIM. STFU, don’t judge.
  • I got the MOST FANTASTIC E-CARD from one of my followers, Like WHOA. BAHAHAHA
  • Some days, I just feel like this:

round guy

  • But, otherwise I’m doing WAYYYYYYY better than I was. :)
  • there are no more of THESE days:


  • I may actually be a rabid cup cake.
  • I have had to use the sentences “Contrary to what it looks like, those marks are not from suction, but from friction. Sorta like an Indian burn. I very sexy Indian burn.” at least once in the last month.
  • I’ve named my Job “Chad”.
  • I’ve seen wayyyyyyy too many “Ankle Pant” action.
  • I have learned that flannel thongs paired with shear pantyhose is a suitable pant substitute. (Have you seen my twitter, you would know this.)


Have I already used this photo? Yeah, I’ve already used it. But, I feel like it’s relevant.

  • My son IS Batman.
  • My best friend has moved in with me to save me from myself, and eat all of my ice cream. (He’s actually ranting about chocolate at the moment. Hysterical.)
  • My Gram has actually been heard saying “No, you have to compare the crotches.” and “We are headed for your pants!” I now have proof she is to blame for my behavior, and sentence choices.
  • I have 2 STD’s and a Bookworm in my house at the moment . MUAHAHAHAHHA
  • Also, while going through my Gram’s computer, I found this:


  • I have not joined any cults.

I think that’s about it. I’m sure I have missed something. Lol. But, now that we all up to speed, HOW ARE ALL OF YOU!!???

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Accidental Art installation By Gram

Today Sucked.

However when I came home from picking up my child I opened the door to the smell of burning plastic.

Which, really, can only mean two things: 1. Grams gotten into the Crack again, or 2. Gram forgot about the bread in the oven and turned it on, again.


To my surprise is wasn’t Crack (OK, kidding. My Gram wouldn’t even know what that was).

Fresh Baked Bread, anyone?





Goodnight friends



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Took my son to the Zoo for Trick or Treating yesterday. He loved it.

He went as Captain America.

I went as the Wicked Bitch that I am. Ha.



Today we went to one of the Bays. We brought lunch and played by the water.












Tomorrow I hope to get to go to some thrift stores. I need everything you can imagine for my new house, and I’m sorry but Walmart doesn’t carry my vintage cookware and Tupperware.

My gram keeps insisting I make a public wishlist for Walmart. I think everyone should just send me their old outdated housewares, instead. But, then again what do I know? LMAO.





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Hey Asshole, its called a divorce for a reason.

Im never getting legally married again.

Jackhole announced removal of responsibility from our joint bank account, and cell phone.

Gets new cell phone, but doesnt remove name from the bank account, I had no idea for a few days. Now, lets keep in mind asshat doesnt have a job.

So, when the service  fee hit the bank account there was a big ToDo about it.

I’m the green color. Keep in mind i was half asleep ugh.



Now lets keep in mind here that the reason there is no money in the account is because I was thrown out of my home, therefore unable to work…….and asshat has the balls to make sure IIIIIIIIII was going to fix it, hahahah.  Wow.

Today asshat decided to lay claim to equipment vital to my office, knowing I have no money to replace it.

I’m framing those divorce papers.

I’m also bring coffee and doughnuts to the bank for the teller who will remove my name from that account.

Fuckin’ Wanker.


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Riding out the storm on Grandma’s couch.

Well, I’m still here. Lol.

I’m not working b/c my Ex took that away from me, and I am just counting down the days till November 11th.

However now that I am not working – I am finding all this great second hand/ vintage furniture that I would just loovvvveeeee to own annnnnnnd I’m broke. When I had money, where was all this stuff – what the hell?

Who wants to buy Catriona a vintage couch set and/or bed frame? LMAO.

Gosh I’ve never been THIS broke before. I should start selling my underroos online, or something. LMAO

OH and then there was this:

Dude randomly followed me on twitter then sent me a private message:
I have an std

Funny, he didn’t reply. BAHAHHAHAH. I have no idea why.

Gosh life better liven up soon, or I am going to start allll sorts of ruckuses.

Oh and also, my grams just said to me: “Of course Jesus can see you pee.”  In case you guys didn’t know, there you go.



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So, my ex came back from vacation yesterday.

This morning, demanded that I leave the house by tonight. TONIGHT.

That was not the plan, and since I work from my home office. I am out of work until I move into the Townhouse I had applied for. Which until about 5pm today was something I wasn’t even sure was going to happen.

Ex did this on purpose to make it harder on me.

What a Jackhole.

They finally got back to me about the Townhouse, they accepted my application. I get the keys in the middle of November. WONDERFUL news, however paying the first month’s rent is going to be a nightmare due to my Ex’s latest antics. I am SURE that was in the calculations. 

Until then, I am technically homeless. I’m sleeping on my grandparents couch (my son has his own room here), I would rather be sleeping on a bus station bench however. But, it will only be until November. My Step-grandfather is a real tool, most of the time.  But, my son is safe, and there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

And despite the impending doom that I feel about the loss of wages, HOLY HELL BATMAN DOES IT FEEL GREAT TO BE FREE.

I can have FRIENDS now! lmao I only have ONE CHILD NOW.  WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH MYSELF?!

So, now, I am sitting here making a list of all the things I need for my new home in order of urgency as all I have is a kitchen table, and I’m smiling like an idiot despite the disaster I am in because for the  first time in years, I’m not wearing any shackles.



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So screwed without me

The washer (that is not coming with me when I move), decided to protest by doing this:


Yeah, that would be nasty water that wouldn’t drain. Sigh.

Annnnnnd even though technically it’s now my Ex’s issue, I still have laundry to do before im done packing. Sigh. So while the Ex was getting hammered on vacation, I took apart the washer. Fixed it, all is well, but man. Just keep adding to the list universe. Thanks.






Yeah. I popped the pump out and found the issue. Yum.

Ex will be paying a nice service fee next time something goes wrong. HAHA.

So, that’s what I’ve been doing, taking shit appart and playing with gunk.

What are you guys up to?


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I drink my owl from the back


That’s right.
I bought myself an owl cup. Some
people buy cars, jewelry, hookers. Me, I bought myself an Owl mug to the tune of my divorce.

Which really, has to be sipped from the back, or things get allllll crazy. Fyi.

Love you guys,

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Just add it to the list.

So you guys know the Universe and I have been fighting.

In Feb I spent a week in the ICU with Drs telling me that my significant other had lost too much oxygen, they weren’t sure there was any brain activity. I had managed to resuscitate before the EMTs showed up, but it took over a week to see brain activity. That person that I brought back isn’t the one I married.

Also in Feb, my close friend lost his leg, had two heart attacks, and lost a part of his mind along the way.

That same month, my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer for the fourth time. This one being the one the Drs said would finally get her.

I was diagnosed with PTSD, so was my son as a result of finding a dead body in my bed.

I had been taking care of this person for three years, on Feb 8th that person died. What I brought back was a nightmare. Now, I am not saying that the three years prior was a cake walk. I took care of everything. The Money, the bills, the house, the animals, the child, the homework, the volunteering at the school, everything. There wasn’t a thing that wasn’t my responsibility. But after Feb our house became volatile. Hostile. Terrible. Horrid. And, I was still taking care of everything. I was being treated in ways I wont disclose.

Last week, I packed up my son without notice and brought him to live with his grandparents while I pack up the house.

I am getting a Divorce.

I’m losing/lost everything. My mother, my friend, my sister. My marriage, my house. When I moved in here this house was a WRECK. like WHOA. I built this house that I am leaving. I trained the dog I can’t keep. I am leaving here with nothing; oh wait I get to keep the kitchen table.  I’m losing all the effort, everything I worked for.

I’m leaving here with HORRID credit b/c there were medical supplies, and insurance that HAD to be obtained, so I let my personal bills go. I’ve sold everything to take care of it all. Granted, I don’t pay rent any more here – this is my Mother in laws house that we had planned on buying, and I have worked damn hard on it. But, I think being a nurse to someone for three years, paying for everything else, and taking care of EVERYTHING evens that out a bit (It doesn’t ask them both).

However, what little I do have left that was valuable, my electronics, is been kept here.  My Ex using the line “This is mine b/c of all they money YOU owe my mother.” At first I was going to fight it, now I am just letting it all go. It’s not worth the fight. I have my kid, and his stuff. That is all that matters.

I’m leaving with the loss of the life I built for my family, for my son. I’m leaving with the damage that has been done to my son. The loss of  my dog, my two cats, my credit, my personal possessions, and all I get to keep is the kitchen table, and the PTSD.

And to top it all off, my son’s other parent couldn’t get out of bed for the last three years, but came home with a brand new 700.00 cell phone last week, and is on vacation right now (getting hammered a friend) while I wait and pray to the stars that the town house I applied to last week accepts me, so I can move my son and what little I have left into a new life.

OH wait, AND – I don’t even get to leave here with my privacy b/c the person who couldn’t even take out the trash for the last three years, had my cell phone hacked last week obtained my journal, my texts, and all of my photos. Good thing I have nothing to hide.

There’s so much more, but just add it all to the list.

Please send positive thoughts my way that I get this town house, my son and I are drowning.


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WHAT?!! (Warning post made in a facility that may contain clowns) *EDIT

It’s August! Yep it is, do you know know what that means?! OCTOBER IS ALMOST HERE. Gosh I love that month.

HOWEVER. Did you know that August contains National Clown Week? WHAT? I sure as hell didn’t, and I’m pretty mad at myself about it. I’m all about Clowns HOW DID I MISS THIS? I didn’t get a memo, WHO FORGOT TO SEND THE MEMO!?

I hate when I miss the memos. I feel like it’s another C- string moment.

I only know because of a post on The Coulrophobia Blog (click here), and WTF HOW DID I NOT KNOW?! AHHH!

I still can’t say the word ‘Coulrophobia’, by the way.


That is all.




* So apparently I’m a jackhole. Hhahaha Mocha DID give me a memo about this, I’m just ridiculous and forgot. HOW THE FUCK I FORGOT THAT IS BEYOND ME. However, WHY IS MOCHA THE ONLY ONE SENDING ME FUCKING MEMOS ABOUT THESE THINGS?!

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